Listening with Intention: How Founders Can Unlock the Next Gen’s Voice
- Suzanne St. John Smith
- 3 days ago
- 4 min read
This is the third in a four-part series on helping the next generation of family business leaders find their voices and helping founders learn to hear them. Whether you’re a founder, a spouse, or a next gen, these articles will give you tools to build trust, respect, and a legacy that lasts.
Read the first article here.
Read the second article here.
Listening with Intention
In an early meeting with the founder of a multinational company, "Charles", his son "Michael", and their senior team were discussing a potential new product line. Michael, who had been working in the business for a long time, began outlining his vision. Almost immediately, Charles interrupted, saying, “Yes, yes, I know where you’re going.” He then redirected the conversation to his own ideas. Charles had a habit of finishing Michael’s sentences, often steering discussions away from his son’s input.
To shift the dynamic, I introduced a three-minute uninterrupted speaking rule. Charles agreed, although somewhat reluctantly. And when Michael began again, the room went quiet. He described a concept that blended their company’s traditional way of building with an entirely new sustainable approach, which the company had never previously considered.
When Michael finished, Charles leaned back, crossed his arms, paused for a minute, and finally turned to his son and said, “I didn’t know you’d thought that far ahead, son.” In that one moment, Charles planted a seed of mutual respect that kept growing in every meeting afterward. He had finally taken the time to listen to Michael with intention and actually consider what he was saying.
If a founder’s leadership identity continues to require that he or she must be the smartest voice in the room, there is no space for the rising generation. Building a legacy across generations in a business involves creating conditions where the smartest ideas can surface, regardless of who they come from. That requires a posture of ‘listening with intention’, and not merely with the goal to speak. It also requires a level of humility on the founder’s part and a willingness to provide the space for their heirs to grow.
It doesn’t mean that what the founders have to say is no longer relevant or important; it just means that they’re beginning to open up the room for a shared discussion where the opinions of others – the ones who’ll be taking the reins from them at one point – can be heard in a respectful and supportive environment.
The Control Paradox
Founders often face what I call the control paradox: holding on tightly feels like protecting the business, but it can weaken the next generation’s readiness to lead. It’s a natural instinct for founders who have built the company from the ground up. They understand the risks and feel deeply responsible for protecting what they’ve created.
When every decision, idea, and process must go through the founder, it can unintentionally train the heirs to be dependent rather than decisive. As a result, once the founder is finally ready to step back, their successors may lack both the skills and the confidence to lead effectively. However, when space is intentionally created for the next generation to “stretch their wings”, they can explore, experiment, and take ownership- developing the capabilities to lead independently. In time, they’ll feel confident enough to “fly on their own”, which, at the heart of it, is precisely what most founders want.
What Founders Can Do
Ask clarifying questions. Instead of jumping in with your answer, say, “Please tell me more….”
Separate evaluation from exploration. Give ideas room to be explored before quickly dismissing them.
Invite input early before a decision feels locked in.
Reward the act of contributing, even if the idea isn’t implemented.
Audit your speaking-to-listening ratio in meetings — if you’re talking more than 60% of the time, you’re not hearing enough.
How Next Gens Can Support Themselves
Signal when you want space to finish. Even a simple, “Let me complete my thought,” can hold the floor.
Bring ideas framed with impact. Outline the potential benefit before diving into details.
Follow up in writing to keep ideas on the table.
The Leadership of Listening
Listening with intention is more than a communication skill; it’s an act of stewardship. When founders consciously make space for the next generation’s ideas, they signal trust and invite growth. And when the next generation feels empowered to step forward with clarity and respect, they demonstrate readiness to lead. Together, these small but powerful shifts move the family enterprise from a single voice of control to a shared chorus of leadership and continuity that can carry the business, and the family legacy, forward.
In the final article, "Bridging the Gap: Creating a Culture of Constructive Dialogue", we’ll explore how to build lasting structures for respectful, open conversation so the family and the business can thrive together for generations.
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